All puddies cannot be the purveyor of purrfection. Donna J. Fennel
FIRST CHRISTMAS FOR LITTLE TOPAZ® Whimsical, original holiday poetic muse
Composed with a chuckle by Donna J. Fennel.
Quilled on this 16th day of November, 2004 ~
(Steve is upset with me about this, too! Read on.)
'Twas the night before Christmas
And all through the Fennel house ~
Not a single creature was stirring,
Not even a measly louse or a mouse.
'Coz little Topaz attacked the nasty rat
While tearing that suffering beast apart.
As she gnawed away, she began to play ~
With his heart, then proceeded to fart.
All of a sudden, what to her wondering
Twinkling amber eyes should appear?
But a titanium sleigh chauffered by
Nine automatron cyber reindeer!
Little Topaz then heard sleigh bells ~
Which made her break for a pause
As she stopped methodically licking ~
The mouse’s blood from her claws.
"It must be Santa," thought my Topaz ~
(Oh, she’s such a clever little brat cat!)
'Coz nobody 'round here climbs down
Our friggin’, filthy chimney like that.
Indeed, it was Ol’ Saint Nick, himself ~
Ever more jolly, and just plain fat ~
Hoisting his mega-load of presents
’Twas all for this naughty black cat.
As she proceeded to hide under a chair ~
Out wanders Steve in his foul underwear.
Which caused poor ol’ Santa quite a scare!
“What a dirty old man!”, as he started to stare.
Sleepwalking Steve was totally oblivious ~
Quite honestly, to all that was going on.
He pulled a wedge, leaning against sill ledge ~
And decided to break out into holiday song.
Santa’s ears couldn’t take this cacophony ~
So he grabbed stockings to shield the noise.
Poor Steve awoke suddenly, just in time ~
To witness Santa and his bagful of toys.
"Wow man, this is the best Christmas ever!"
Little Topaz thought, releasing a mulled purr ~
While she engaged in a furball vomit endeavor
And shed some of her angora fur ~ what a stir!
”Well, Steve gave Santa quite a peep show!”
Little Topaz thought, while she wiped snot.
When suddenly, it began to gently snow ~
Santa said, "O, heavens ~ it’s time to trot."
Then Steve spotted Little Topaz behind the chair ~
And he whipped her butt with his dirty underwear.
He didn’t particularly care if Santa saw his thong ~
Draping himself with stockings, breaking into song .
Once up on the rooftop, Santa gave out a whistle ~
And his reindeer all flew like the down on a thistle.
Then Little Topaz and Steve heard Santa exclaim,
As he and his team hyperdrove way out of sight,
“Christmas is killin’ me; I’ve had one helluva night.”
Happy New Year from Romeo, Emperor of Donnadreamland.
He's done working with Santa this year. Thank you for visiting.
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